All dogs go to heaven, even though they don’t go to a doggy church or worship a doggy deity. They go because they’re good, and that’s enough.

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The goodest boys


You’d think that’d be good enough for everyone, but god likes to punish very good, humble, compassionate people for minor transgressions such as calling him by the wrong name or working on days that are supposed to be set aside for worshiping him while murderers, thieves, and scoundrels ascend into heaven because their crimes were committed in his name. Good dog.


They’re good dogs, Brent.


Eh, actually going to heaven isn’t the result of works. Not even religious, I just know this


Well, yeah. That’s because god(s) isn’t real.