If cryonic freezing actually worked, was safe, easy to use and affordable for the average consumer, some exhausted parents would probably freeze their kids occasionally.

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That’s horrific, “yeah, our daughter has Ben 5 years old for the last 17 years, we only thaw her for holidays and family events. She is going to stay our little girl forever.”


The vitrification works. It’s the reviving part that is still on the boards.


“Timmy! Did you just break the tv? That’s it go to your cryo tube!”


Freeze your kid until the job market improves.


Doing the opposite and roasting them in a furnace works for longer.