It’s just started raining really hard and all my wife is doing is standing at the window looking sad…

If it gets any stronger I’ll have to let her in

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All you need is an umbrella. To block the view of the window. (From the inside)


*You should have known this one was coming:* “Give it to me!” she screamed, “I’m so fucking wet, give it to me now!” She could scream all she wanted, I was keeping the umbrella.


Please let her in before the guy confessing in the church gets there.


Made me chuckle. Take an upvote


If you ever wonder who loves you more, your wife or your dog. Lock both of them in the.trunk of your car for an hour and see who’s happy too see you when you open it.