I once gave my husband the silent treatment for an entire week. When it was over, he said

, “We got along really well there for a while!”

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A man and his wife get into a fight and decide to give each other the silent treatment. The husband turns out to be a deep sleeper and often relies on his wife to wake him up in time for work. He realizes he needs her to help wake up, but is unwilling to reconcile differences. At 8pm, he writes a note saying “Honey, please wake me up at 7 am, I need to get up early for work tomorrow”, and leaves it on her side of the bed then proceeds to go to bed. Next morning, he wakes at 9.30 am. He jumps out of bed, startled and upset his wife did not wake him. As he is about to step into his bath robe, he notices a note similar to the one he wrote to his wife. It says, “Honey, honey, wake up! it’s 7.30. You don’t want to be late for work!”


When my gf wanted chapstick, I accidentally gave her a glue stick. She still isn’t talking to me.


Bob and Andy are out fishing and Bob says to Andy “My wife hasn’t spoken to me in several months. I think I’m going to divorce her”. Bob responds “You should reconsider women like that are hard to find”.


I went out with my buddies Friday after work and one thing lead to another and I didnt get home until Monday Night. My wife was pissed. She yelled, “How would you like it if I just took off without a note or a phone call?” I said, “Fine by me.” So I didn’t see her on the first day, didn’t see her on the second day, on the third day I finally saw her for a little bit, because the swelling went down in my left eye.


My girlfriend caught me cheating on her and broke up with me. So to be a dick I took her wheelchair. Wouldn’t you know, she came crawling back to me.