My wife said to me “If I ever get Alzheimer’s I would commit suicide rather than burdening you with me”

I said “That’s the fifth time you’ve said that today”

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What is the worst combination of illnesses? Alzheimer’s and diarrhea. You’re running, but can’t remember where.


I told this joke to my wife, she said it wasn’t funny. I said she thought it was funny last time I told it to her.


TFW you search Alzheimer’s on Google for the first time, but all the links are purple…


A wife takes her husband to the doctor for an AIDS test and an Alzheimer’s test. The office calls later to apologize for mixing up the results. One is positive and one is negative, but they don’t know which is which. The wife says, “What do I do now?” The doctor says “Drop him off a mile away. If he shows up at home, don’t fuck him.”


As someone who has lost older relatives and a grandfather to this, you made me sad. As someone who’s grandpa loved to make Alzheimer’s jokes in his lucid moments, take my upvote.