little Johny is Back

The teacher asked the class to use the word “fascinate” in a sentence. Molly put up her hand and said, “My family went to my grandpa’s farm, and we all saw his pet sheep. It was fascinating.” The teacher said, “That was good, but I wanted you to use the word ‘fascinate,’ not ‘fascinating’.” Sally raised her hand. She said, “My family went to see Rock City and I was fascinated.” The teacher said, “Well, that was good Sally, but I wanted you to use the word ‘fascinate’.” Little Johnny raised his hand, but the teacher hesitated because she had been burned by Little Johnny before. She finally decided there was no way he could damage the word “fascinate,” so she called on him. Johnny said, “My aunt Carolyn has a sweater with ten buttons, but her tits are so big she can only fasten eight!”

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Little Johnny’s neighbor had a bby. Unfortunately, the baby was born without ears. When the mother and new baby came home from the hospital, Johnny’s family was invited over to see the baby. Before they left their house, Little Johnny’s dad had a talk with him and explained that the baby had no ears. His dad also told him that if he so much mentioned anything about the baby’s missing ears or even said the word ears, he would get the smacking of his life when they came back home. Little Johnny told his dad he understood completely. When Johnny looked in the crib he said, ‟What a beautiful baby.” The mother said, ’Why, Thank you Johnny.‟ Johnny said, ”He has beautiful little feet, beautiful little hands, a cute little nose and really beautiful eyes. Can he see all right?‟ ”Yes‟, the mother replied, ”we’re so thankful; the Doctor said he’ll have 20/20 vision.‟ ”That’s great‟, said Little Johnny, ”cause he’d be fucked if he needed glasses!‟


I always imagine it as the same teacher and Lil Johnny frm other jokes.


Super random but is “little Johnny” always like that? Always a bit dumb, a bit too smart for his own good and often a bit rude. Because it sounds like the dutch “Pietje”. (Jantje! – roughly translates to little Jan or the former little Pete). “Pietje and grandma are walking down the street when Pietje sees a pamflet on the floor that he wanted to grab No, said grandma. Everything on the floor is dirty. They continue walking until Pietje sees a €5,- bill on the floor. And before he could reach out his grandma again said: No pietje, everything on the floor is dirty. Pietje then sees a banana peel, says nothing and grandma slips. Please help me up Pietje! Pietje: No grandma because everything on the floor is dirty.”


You do nt need the end line, takes it from 100 back to 0


I have an aunt called Carolyn